Monday, August 2, 2010

Never Underestimate a Mother

I told some of you that I would post a paper that I had written in college regarding the skills that are learned being a mother. The paper was called, "My Introduction."

I wrote this introduction and published it on my college website partially in response to so many who question womens decisions in life. Namely the decision to stay at home with their children. Then when the children are older and a woman re-enters the marketplace, her lack of years in the field due to being a mother

I hope that you enjoy it and that it sparks some great discussions!

My Introduction: I would like to introduce myself to you, my classmates. My name is Debra and I am in my last few semesters of an integrative studies degree that is comprised of Psychology, Business management and IT.

My first impulse was to introduce myself as a mother; however, I have been told that one needs to define oneself as more that just a parent. I will nevertheless use this as a way of introducing myself to you because I feel that this has been the single most important thing that has influenced my life and given me the ability and knowledge to do so many things that, while not seemingly linked, nonetheless are synchronistic.

For example, I am currently an officer and Vice-President of a land and web based company. To attain and maintain this position, I have been called upon to utilize all of the skills that I have learned from being a parent, such as:
  1. Management
  2. Organization
  3. Communication
  4. Conflict Resolution
  5. Conflict prevention
  6. Conflict readiness
  7. Mediation
  8. Psychology
  9. Creative problem solving
  10. Patience
  11. Stress Management
  12. Economics
  13. Research
  14. The list could go on and on!
As a parent, and as a vice president of an organization, one has to manage not only the household/company, but also the interactions between the individuals in the household/company. This even includes the lunch breaks and the hours worked overtime!
From now on when using the phrase household/company, I will combine them in the phrase, “The Company” to avoid over using the “/” symbol!
Organizing all elements of a household, including one’s own time and everyone else’s time, insures the seamless running of the household. Being organized, and knowing the fundamentals of organization of tasks and time, helped me when I had to set up guidelines for the best usage of time and elements in the corporation that I am working for.
Communication, or the lack of communication, between my family members has taught me that it is one of the most important elements needed to run an organization. The harmonious and effective running of The Company can be disrupted by a lack of understanding between two members of the organization. Improperly communicating ones needs when a task needs to be accomplished results in improperly executed tasks and can lead to conflicts between all parties.
Being able to envision what type of conflicts could arise within the household or from outside the household, and taking steps to prevent these conflicts from happening, is a daily task that a parent has to handle. This is of great importance to the running of any type of organization. Setting up a plan of action should conflicts occur and resolving the conflicts that occur in the best way possible insures the survival of The Company.
Mediation between two parties to smooth ruffled feathers and insure productivity is a job that parents know well! Psychology is utilized here as well! These skills are vital to the management of an organization.
Regardless of what occurs in a household, or in a work environment, having the patience to deal with the problems and creatively coming up with solutions to problems are vital to the continued productivity and growth of the organization.
Effective communication, envisioning of conflicts prior to an occurrence, having a plan for dealing with conflict, mediation, patience and creatively solving problems has another great side effect, stress reduction!
The running of a household also taught me that budgeting money that is on hand and saving money through wise and economical purchases are important aspects of future financial planning. In my company this knowledge has assisted me in constructing realistic assessments of our current and future needs.
As a parent I have been asked to explain what something is, or why something is, at least a million times! Out of self-preservation, I have learned to conduct research to find out what things are or why things are. This researching was fine tuned in my past and current tasks at work. These tasks entailed conducting market research and competitive analysis as well as future technological and geographical needs. So what began as a parent answering the “what’s” and the “whys” led to the learning of a crucial work skill.
Explaining the answers to the frequently asked questions of a child also led to another ability that a parent gains…teaching skills!
All in all, my job as a parent has taught me the skills necessary to be successful in life in a meaningful and experiential way that has led to a lucrative and satisfying career!
The first thing that I thought of when asked to introduce myself is truly an important part of what has formed who I am. So…I can proudly say in this introduction to you my classmates that I am a mother…
dcincioni© 2009


  1. Very nicely written and so true. I also chose to stay home and raise my children. The most important skill I took away from that was working with a budget. In other words, how to make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.

    Big business does not realize the skills, experience, and ability to stick to something that a mother brings to the work force. Especially the older woman who also brings with her dedication and a sense of pride in a job well done.

  2. I am so glad I follow you on Twitter (@sdbargainmama). Thank you for sharing your personal thoughts on taking your skills back to the workforce, which is an issue of contention many moms have after taking time off to rear our kids.


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